Your Clutter Reflects Your Life
A cluttered life is a cluttered mind, so unless you want to be committed to the R-Wing, clean up your act. Go ahead and call Marie, spend oodles of your hard-earned cash having someone babysit your useless tidying efforts, or strap a set on and let's go!
Seriously, folks. Begin with your car. I knew a woman in her early 30s who was a driving county dump. She claimed she gathered her soda cans for the extra-added income from recycling. Please. Spare me the excuses for your traveling dumpsite.
It was then I realized who was peeking into my closets and yanking the bathroom curtains back at my dinner parties. The mobile county dump! She was positive she'd find my dirty laundry hiding in the bathtub. However, she was too mentally numb to realize everything I do is in a perfect line and I immediately notice when something is moved. The first thing I do to get to really know another is to gracefully peek into their car. Aha! You're disgusting and I knew it!
After your car is free from debris and the steering wheel is now visible, look at an area of your home, which doesn't have too much clutter. This is so your clutter-collecting mind doesn't freak out. Perhaps, your dining room table only has one stack of dated magazines? Yeah, those are worth keeping and are definitely a collector's item.
Once you have the courage to toss those bad boys into the recycling bin, move onto the knick-knacks nestled comfortably covered in dust atop your stereo cabinet. If you can't bear to part with them because your children may want them after you head onto the Great Divide, for God's sake, put them into a plastic bin in the attic. Your children will most assuredly toss them into the recycling bin with those lousy magazines the moment you're dead.
Have you taken a look at all of the dishes you collected over the years? Are they "really, really, really good-looking"?! Ben Stiller, in Zoolander, may beg to differ. In fact, Auntie Martha's silver may actually be stainless steel from Woolworths. Go ahead. I dare you to cash in on those priceless gems. They don't polish and will always be ugly. Do your kids honestly want these in their drawers?
Let's get real about the clothes in your closet. They're hideous and you look horrible in them. Ladies, you're bursting from the seams in these dated items, the skirts are now way too short and the heels are too high to walk gracefully. Your upper portion is billowing over the V-neck blouse and it's quite frankly embarrassing. Men, the belt is so far below your non-existent waistline, it's like, "Who are you kidding? Certainly, not me!" If your clothes don't fit properly, get rid of them.
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